Gray's Matter
Justice Gray - North America's favorite metrosexual software consultant
E-mail Justice
Subscribe to this feed
Subscribe to comments
Perennially Popular Posts
How to write a presentation abstract
My grandmother, globalization, and what's wrong with DateTime.Parse
A letter to my Worldvision sponsor child
Development Methodologies for the 21st Century
My grandmother & the difference between strong typing and weak typing
How I am becoming a better developer, part 1 of infinity
Facebook RSS Feeds: How to Write Your Own With C#
The Ten Keys To Happiness
My grandmother and the Global Assembly Cache (And Star Wars)
My grandmother and the difference between processes and threads
How to make a meeting request
Why you should never be an independent consultant
The DasBlog 1.9 AJAX Autosave True Story, Part 2
Other "metro" developers
Ben Scheirman
Bil Simser
D'Arcy Lussier
David Woods
Donald Belcham
Donald Jessop
George Clingerman
James Kovacs
Jason Hunt
Jason Row
Jean-Paul Boodhoo
Jeffrey Palermo
Joey deVilla
John Bristowe
Jonas Avellana
Kyle Baley
Mack Male
Martin Hinselwood
Michael McClenaghan
Mike Duncan
Mike Friesen
Mo Khan
Otyce
RoboSapient
Russell Ball
Scott Hanselman
Scott Reynolds
Steven Rockarts
Tech Embassy
Terry Thibodeau
Tom Opgenorth
Vladimir Levin
The Justice Gray Fan Club
Amazing Mrs. Loquacious
Dr. Teeth
Facedown
Janey Lynne
Maxime Lamy
Ridley Thunder
Stan Woo
Vanilla Con
Wobbly*Bits
I Wish These People Updated More Than Once a Year
Anand Narayan
Jeff Perrin
<< The Dasblog 1.9 AJAX Autosave true story (part 2)
The Ten Keys to Happiness >>
I dream of Edmonton Code Camp
Yeah, you wish
When I started my blog lo those many months ago, I had vowed to myself that I would *never* make a post describing a dream that I had. After all, every blog author thinks that their dream is *far* more exciting and interesting to others than it actually is! However, the combination of:
D'Arcy
and
Donald
posting about their
Street Fighter restaurant/Brokeback Elephant Herding dreams, respectively
my dream being about
Edmonton Code Camp
my having absolutely *no* understanding of what this dream meant, even a week and a half later
inspired me to share this story with you.
We start inside of the Edmonton Public Library. There are something like 300 people at this place, all of them raring to go talk about code. John Coltrane is playing in the background as I chat it up with several developers about a variety of deep, insightful topics like who
the greatest Piranacon
was and whether
Fight Club's characters are really a grown-up Calvin and Hobbes
. All of a sudden, I hear a bell ringing and I realize that not only has Code Camp started, but I am *late* for my presentation with
Steven Rockarts
!! "Giant Steps" by Coltrane plays over the loudspeaker as I race down the hall, shoving people aside. One person gets pushed into the wall and *explodes*, with blood and guts flying everywhere! I finally get to the door of the Code Camp meeting room, but it is locked solid, though I can hear Donald talking. There is a window on the door the size of my head...can I get through? I back up, and then charge at the door, aiming at the tiny square of glass in front of me. I manage to violate several laws of physics as I dive through and glass flies everywhere inside the convention room. I am bloodied and on the ground but I am still able to talk. Donald is up at the podium talking; I turn and shout to him, "Hey, I'm here, buddy! I'm ready for my presentation!"
Artist's representation of my sensational arrival
Donald looks at me for a brief instant. Then into the mic he says, "Uh...yeah, whatever." and then turns back to the crowd, *ignoring* me! The crowd laughs. Obviously I'm a little peeved at there being no mention of my spectacular entrance, so I pick up a
giant metal folding chair
and throw it straight at Donald's head. My aim is true! As it collides there is a large clanging noise (I guess Donald has a steel plate in his cranium) and Donald crumples to the ground.
The assembled crowd of at least 150 people stands up out of their seats and *cheers wildly*!! I soak up the cheers, wipe some of the blood from my eyes and then proceed to the microphone, stepping over Donald's unconscious body. Just as I am about to speak, I wake up...refreshed, rejuvenated like never before!
So, what is the lesson I've learned from this dream*? Obviously, Code Camp is going to be like "Passenger 57" with myself as the white Wesley Snipes. Flying metal folding chairs!! Shattered glass and shattered dreams!! A
Ruby presentation
being given by a presenter soaked in his own blood!!! And this was just the first
*5 MINUTES*
!!! If you want thrills, chills, and some blood spills, Edmonton Code Camp is where you need to be. If it is even half as action-packed as this dream, I think you attendees are in for a
serious treat
on September 30th!!! Sign up now before you miss the event of a *lifetime*.
Obviously, quite a strong resemblance to yours truly
* I'm open to hearing other interpretations of this dream, but I doubt they are as accurate as my own prognostications
Thursday, August 31, 2006
Comments [4]
EDMUG
|
Personal
|
Technical
|
Tracked by:
"Justice at Victoria Code Camp: Now with *BONUS* presentation!" (Gray's Matter)
[Trackback]
8/31/2006 2:55:37 PM (Mountain Daylight Time, UTC-06:00)
Why am I never in your dreams? It amazes me that code supercedes wife in dream priority sequence. BOORAY indeed.
mrsloquacious
8/31/2006 4:47:05 PM (Mountain Daylight Time, UTC-06:00)
Well. I'm really not 100% sure what I should say about this.
1) The crowd laughing at me ignoring you. I'm not going to read anything into this as it happens at every Edmug meeting and I've determined it to be the norm now.
2) The metal chair makes a clang 'cause I have a metal plate in my head, yet I still get knocked out by said chair. While I don't quite follow the logic here, I'm not surprised that you came up with it. Perhaps it's an attempt to expose the anger you have at my superiority with the masses.
3) Door is locked. Yah. The more posts like this that you write, the more doors you'll find locked just as you show up.
4) Breaking several laws of physics. It's a dream so I'll let this one pass. Heck I was herding elephants in mine so stranger things have happened.
All in all I think you're terrified of presenting at Code Camp and I'm going to suggest to Rockarts that he have material to cover for you when you freeze.
The Igloo Coder
8/31/2006 4:55:55 PM (Mountain Daylight Time, UTC-06:00)
1) We are in agreement that there is definitely a lot of people laughing at you at the average EDMUG meeting ;)
2) Buddy, it's a dream sequence!! My suggestion is that the chair shot drove the iron plate straight into the remaining organic brain you had left.
3) I know you're fearful of my chair-throwing abilities.
4) I like how you let the "breaking laws of physics" pass but you wanted to debate the head-clanging stuff. =)
Of course I'm terrified of presenting at Code Camp! It's tough enough having to fend off your lustful advances at most of the meetings let alone having to do it in front of a crowded stage! ;)
Rockarts is prepared for me to hurriedly rush through what little presentation I have in 10 minutes flat - he'll be carrying everything on his back after that. =)
Justice
9/5/2006 9:49:44 AM (Mountain Daylight Time, UTC-06:00)
If only every developer conference is just as exciting :)
Dickson Wong
|
dicksonAT NOSPAMparamagnus dot com
Name
E-mail
Home page
Remember Me
Comment (HTML not allowed)
Enter the code shown (prevents robots):
Justice Gray
: a seething cauldron of rampaging masculinity. A fighter! A brother! Your
secret lover
! He's also a software development consultant and the Vice President of the
Edmonton .NET user group
. He also greatly enjoys speaking about himself in the 3rd person.
Gray's Matter Archives
Recent Posts
No bias to see here
Foreshadowing is over
Foreshadowing, part II
Foreshadowing
Controversy clarifications!
The most controversial interview of ALL TIME
Finally! The *winner* of the "What Justice Gray Means to Me" contest
The mystery of D'Arcy Lussier's ASP.NET MVP is solved...
Well, now that's pretty horrifying
MVPs on MVC: "No, we don't have any idea either"
Why I am happy to not be at the MVP Summit
Post Categories
BookReviews
Conferences
DasBlog
EDMUG
Goals
HanselmanQuestions
HotDeveloperCorner
ILiveToInform
Leadership
Mac
OtherGrayAreas
Personal
Productivity
Ruby
Suresh
Technical
Transformers
Vancouver
Wii
<
August 2008
>
Sun
Mon
Tue
Wed
Thu
Fri
Sat
27
28
29
30
31
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
31
1
2
3
4
5
6
Sign In