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Justice Gray - North America's favorite metrosexual software consultant
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In the event of my death...
Gray’s Matter isn’t all about
AJAX and autosave with Jesus Christ
,
Spider-Man and pseudo-agile development
. Sometimes it’s nice to cut back from the technical fluff and engage you, the readership, in deep thoughtful content.
DEEP.
Rory Blyth’s recent post on “writing your obituary ahead of time”
got me thinking (and for those of you who know me, you understand that thinking and I combined are
very dangerous
). At first I mulled over what my own obituary would look like. Having the attention span of a gnat I became bored with this, realizing that I was
far
more interested in what would happen to me after death. Not me as in "my eternal soul" me, but "me" as "my physical and hopefully zombified remains" me. Sharing my last requests with my family is a little too macabre for them, so instead I'm going with the next best thing...sharing with
the internet
.
When my body finally expires, I would like to be
shot out of a cannon
. I do not mean cremate my remains and shoot the ashes out of a cannon; I mean, take my corpse and shoot
*it*
out of a cannon. I know that this already sounds like one of the raddest ideas you've ever heard of, but as usual, I am taking the awesomeness and moving it one step further. I don't just want to be shot out of a cannon, but I want my remains to be shot out of a cannon
into a crowded metropolitan area
.
Handy diagram
See, there's nothing all that memorable about your average burial, and even cremation is relatively commonplace. Shooting a corpse into a farmers field? Maybe my body will be eaten by livestock but that's about as cool as that would get. However, I have a dream that one day people will be walking downtown, going about their daily business, when all of a sudden a dead body crashes into the ground straight in front of them! People won't know if it's raining corpses or if they're in the middle of a flying zombie attack! And with that, I will have accomplished the same thing in death that I have in life...
ABSOLUTE BEDLAM
. Who even *needs* an obituary? This event is all I need as my epitaph.
What would you like done in the case of your death? Anything *remotely* as cool as this?
Saturday, September 02, 2006
Comments [3]
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Tracked by:
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"Martin Fowler's Refactoring - the book that brought me *back to life*" (Gray's ...
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9/2/2006 11:11:40 PM (Mountain Daylight Time, UTC-06:00)
I would get robotic implants so that after death I could live as a robot... It might start to smell after a while though.
Alex Bath
|
alexbathAT NOSPAMgmail dot com
9/3/2006 12:18:16 AM (Mountain Daylight Time, UTC-06:00)
Looks like someone should be reading Stiff, the non-fiction work about cadavers.
Jago
9/3/2006 1:05:24 AM (Mountain Daylight Time, UTC-06:00)
Yeah, Dev has really been talking that one up recently; so many books on my plate and so little time!!
Justice~!
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Justice Gray
: a seething cauldron of rampaging masculinity. A fighter! A brother! Your
secret lover
! He's also a software development consultant and the Vice President of the
Edmonton .NET user group
. He also greatly enjoys speaking about himself in the 3rd person.
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